Wednesday, 30 May 2018

Blue Sky Thinking

Hey friends,

How goes it? After what feels like the longest winter ever, and even though I wonder whatever happened to Spring, it's already mid May. The garden is looking plump and verdant. And even though there were several victims of the frost and snow, there is floral abundance in every corner. My garden is now full of self seeded loveliness; a dream of mine when it was a fledgling. There are lots of insects flitting to and fro. This morning a gorgeous orange tip flew in, landing here and there. There is a resident speckled wood that will make haste from the tree canopy if anything steals a march on his patch. Lots of fat careering bumbles, honey bees and other pollinators too. The garden is alive in so many different ways, and it's a pleasure and a privilege to potter amongst it.

We have spent time at the beach. Olly is becoming quite the proficient body boarder, and will happily play for hours in the sea. There's usually other boys from his year group there, and they make the job of the watchful Mum much easier. I can sit on my rug and relax while he whoops and splashes in the surf. Honestly, what could be better than some unadulterated play that isn't punctuated by my cautionary pleas to hold my hand, keep to the inside of the pavement, don't run too fast, slow down. I can hear myself sometimes, and it saddens me that all I can see is danger and calamity. It's been drip fed to me over the years - inside safe, outside unsafe - when of course it's all relative anyway. On the beach, Olly gets to experience a little of what it was like for me as a kid. That sense of freedom which allows you to experience new and familiar situations. He comes home tired and happy, with a new cluster of freckles and exciting tales to tell.

Sam turned twenty one last Friday, and also had his final Uni exam. I'm far too young for a son that old! He has interviews at Leeds and Manchester to train to become a teacher starting in September. I spoke to him briefly; what I really wanted to do was drive up to Liverpool and give him a great big bear hug. I have a real sense of him leaving the nest. He won't be home for much of the summer. He's off to America for half of it, and working at his job in Liverpool for the rest. I've got my eye on a frock for his graduation in July, and am determined to spend a few days there with him then. It's hard, this letting go business. I still send him abusive texts from the cat. And delicious gurning selfies too. They rarely garner a response. I think they may annoy him. However I shall keep doing it. I'm tenacious like that.

Alfie has landed himself a job at a takeaway pizza joint. He loves it, plus he gets to bring home a pizza after every shift and unlimited fizzy drinks while he's working. Alf is easily pleased. I am ecstatic. I thought I'd have terrible trouble trying to get him off his arse and into gainful holiday employment. If he's lucky it may be a job in the quieter months too. Alf likes money very much. He likes to count it. He likes taking it to the bank. He's not so keen on revising. The GCSE bandwagon is still rolling along. The school has been putting on holiday revision sessions, which he is attending, and so I'm contenting myself with that. Through gritted teeth. I'll be glad when it's all over to be honest. Roll on college in September.

The purchase of The Wink is dragging its' heels. This week is all about the mining survey. We are now required to obtain a full survey of past mining activity in the area - and in particular around the house - as a result of the mining searches. I'm not sure the original builders of the property would have built the house on or in a mine. At the time it was built, it would have been pretty obvious where they were. But fast forward some hundred and sixty or so years, and the requirement is that it needs to be investigated. It's been rather fascinating to look at the maps showing old mining works and excavations, and it's given us a real sense of history of the area we will be moving to. Seeing it has strengthened our resolve to move there. That and the bluebells.

And how are you all? I'm aware that I've been rather absent of late. Life seems to be getting in the way, and my motivation for many things has been rather poor. I have found it difficult to settle to the page, and the words don't seem to be coming my way. Perhaps that's way all I'm writing down are a jumbled round up of stuff. In truth, I've rather lost my writing mojo. It happens. It will return. I shall be inspired once more no doubt. It's all about rhythm and balance, and mine has been rather off kilter lately. I didn't realise how much being kicked in the guts could affect me. I don't seem to pick myself up as quickly as I used to. Having said that, I have plotted a new running route, and will be going out on Saturday. It's my toe being dipped back into the water. The rest should follow after.

Take care friends,

Leanne xx


  1. I love the thought of abusive texts from the cat and gurning selfies! Definitely keep on with those - I bet he secretly loves them! I know what you mean about offspring growing up. My eldest is now 24 - how is that possible? I'm glad that The Wink isn't sitting on top of a mine and that Alf is enjoying his job - I'd be tempted by one that gave me free pizza too! Take care. xx

  2. So lovely to see those sea pictures. Very calming and soothing. I’m glad things are ticking over nicely with the family. L rarely replies to my texts either. Really glad to you see returning to running. I suspect it will do you the power of good. Something of your own to focus on that relies on no one else and involves no one else xxx

  3. Hi Leanne. So much happening in your life! Unfortunately my Sam will be a home student and sending him silly selfies might not be so much fun because I'll be able to see him rolling his eyes :-)

    Good news about Alfie's job, too. Pizza is always good. Sam works in the Chinese and is always bringing home some food, part of his salary. I'd prefer pizza.

    How wonderful for Olly to spend so much time surfing. I would love to be able to offer this to my boys, it sounds like so much fun. I am still holding Alistair's hands when we cross the road, I am quite anxious with traffic. Also, I love his tiny hand in mine, makes my heart thing. It is difficult to let them grow up isn't it? I force myself to let mine roam the neighbourhood but I am sitting on needles when they are out, despite all the bravado I may display on the outside. The other day, the boys went missing for an hour and I am still feeling stressed.

    Glad the Wink is not on top of a mine. I am really excited for you and hope all will be sorted soon xx

  4. Where will Sam be in the US? Tell him he has hot meals, a shower, and couches for sleeping if he's ever in New Mexico. He is welcome anytime. Your kids are automatically my friends. I hope the summer is good to all of you. Alfie sounds like he's doing well, and Olly is growing like crazy. I hope you're feeling better all the time. I completely understand what you're going through, I'm feeling similarly these days. I think we'll both be fine. I'm excited about the Wink and I hope your new job is going well!

  5. I really enjoyed this post, don’t worry your writing mojo is still there after all 😊

  6. Lovely to read a post by you, Leanne. It's good to hear things are going well – kids, house, garden, you! I'm all of a dither about my boy heading off to uni in September as I know it's the beginning of the proper separation. It's exciting and how things should be but I'm not ready. I suspect that feeling never quite goes. I hope you have a wonderful few days with your boy at his graduation. I hope everything goes well with The Wink and it all gets a move on. I'm sure you're champing at the bit to get in there. Sam x

  7. Happy birthday to Sam, and I can't believe he's finished Uni already, it seems only five minutes ago he was off to Liverpool. Glad things are going okay with everyone. I understand about the writing mojo thing. I think spring is a classic time for losing it a little. Suddenly nature is in your face shouting, 'Out here, get out here now and LOOK AT ME!' And who are we to argue? But you're right, the mojo does always return. Well done on the running plans, I hope you have a good run on Saturday and get back into it. I shall be trying to contain excitement levels as the littlest boy approaches his tenth birthday. I honestly think he might explode. CJ xx

  8. Hello Leanne. I seemed to lose track of your blog for a while so caught up last night. Big changes afoot in all areas of your life and it was good to read that you have closed a chapter in life’s book and been pro active in getting yourself some paid employment. Good luck with the house move-the Scottish system is so much simpler in buying and selling. We have spent tge last 30 years in our forever home and have now reached the stage where we may need to look at future needs. In the meantime we have bought a motorhome with most of our rainy day fund and intend to live each day as it comes. My own Leanne is now 43 and I’m not sure how that happened. Happy days to come and who knows, we may just meet in St Ives one day soon as I love the light down in your part of the country.

  9. I'm glad you're running again. I haven't been for months, I fear I may never get going with it again. But there is so much going on in your life; your boys grow and change, you are moving house, your new job. But you seem like you're rolling with it. You might not feel like it, but I sometimes think that pretending that you are is half the battle. You have to force yourself to embrace the change, and then the good, quiet moments come later. Lots of luck to Sam - teaching, cripes?! Who'd consider that for a career change I wonder.... ;-) xxxx

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