Two Weeks In

So we have made it through the first two weeks of a new school year with barely a scrape. Samuel is currently writing, editing and having vetted his personal statement for his Uni application. He is attending several open days over the next couple of months. I think he quite fancies Liverpool, although the Oxbridge route is also a real possibility. It's a very exciting/daunting time for him, I think. And I'm excited for him too. And slightly alarmed by his intelligence, and where it may take him. Wherever he ends up, he's going to have a ball.

Alfie has had a good start too. I think not being the newbie has had some positive effects. Apparently the new children that have joined this year are 'so immature." Hmmm. To be honest his first year at secondary school was pretty grim in terms of his behaviour and attitude. Not so much at school, but definitely at home. So hoorah for school hierarchy! Especially if it gives this Mum some respite.

And Olly? Well, his first two weeks of school have been interesting. His school operates a gentle settling in period, so he has only attended for three hours for the past two weeks. Next week he will stay and have lunch, and then come home. And the week after that he starts full time. Given how tired he has been just attending for three hours, I do worry about how he will cope when he has to go full time. I'm hoping that it's just that everything is new and different, and therefore a little stressful for him. He has objected on a number of occasions at having to go every day.

As for me, can I admit to looking forward to when he does go full time? Not that I won't miss him, because I will. But school was always going to happen, wasn't it. I did toy with home schooling, but actually I don't think I'd be very good at it. I read Jennifer's post with great interest and admiration. I like the idea of a 50/50 approach, but that wouldn't be an option here. And I think that Olly wouldn't benefit long-term to being taught at home full time. And to be honest, it wouldn't be good for me either. Can I admit to a craving for my own company? I have a number of plans for those hours, and I feel rather excited about it. Nothing very glamorous or high achieving, to be sure. But then I never was one for reaching for the stars. But to have some time. Yes that sounds very appealing.

So for the past couple of weeks, my days have been a little dis-jointed. I drop Pops off, go for a swim or walk Honey, fly around the house with the vacuum and then pick him up again. He has needed quiet time, and so we have spent hours on the sofa, or quietly playing Lego. I don't mind. I have cherished it actually. Here I am with one just starting school, and one about to fly the nest. There's a lot going on!

We have been out and about. The weather has been glorious in West Cornwall. It always is in September. Our last hurrah, before the Autumn kicks in. We have spent time on the beach, and time up the country lanes. On Wednesday we went looking for hips, and found ourselves at St John's In The Field. The grounds of the church are a nature reserve, and there are always things to do and see. I found the hips (yay), and we also found conkers, feathers, leaves and seed pods. Back home I made rosehip syrup. Ostensibly for health. But actually for cocktails and an accompaniment to Prosecco. Honestly that and the sloe gin steeping in the broom cupboard, anyone would think I'm a foraging lush.

I got very over-excited about the butterflies gorging themselves in the sunshine. I haven't seen a Comma all summer, but there were several and they seemed quite docile and happy for me to get up close and personal. It never fails to bring such pleasure, this pursuit of the butterfly. I have a little app on my phone that I can use to help me identify them. I can also log the ones that I spotted. What more does a nature nerd need!

Two weeks in, and things are good. Thank goodness for that.

Have a great weekend!

Leanne xxx

Lately

Hello!

How are you? Well I hope.

Hey, thank you all so much for your lovely comments about my guest post on The Colour Collaborative. Really. Warmed the cockles of my heart. Lovely people.

































July has flashed by. I'm staring August in the face, and the long summer holiday is stretched out before me. I've written a list. Three actually. Four if you count my Camp Bestival list (we are going on Thursday). I feel a little as if the holidays started a couple of weeks ago, but it may just be that the weather has been so great that opportunities for outdoor fun has been maximised.

Olly has finished nursery. I made a giant cream tea for the teaching staff to enjoy. He bounded out on his last day with a cake and lots of crafty stuff. He said goodbye and didn't look back. I cried my eyes out on the way home. When do you start looking back or feeling nostalgic? Little ones just don't do they. Onward to new adventures. Life is just one long summer holiday for them I reckon.

We have enjoyed evenings at the beach, tea overlooking Godrevy, walks in the woods, a trip out in the fishing dingy, spotting seals in the harbour, crafting madness at home, Lilo and Stitch on Netflix, making Rhubarb and Strawberry jelly (heavenly) and general pottering and pootling about. Don't get me wrong, it's not all been plain sailing. Olly has not been sleeping well, Alfie has been an utter git and Sam is tired - and therefore teasy -  from all the pot washing at work. So it can be a drag here, to be honest. As I've said before, it's those very concentrated periods of hideousness that seem to place a weight on top of my head and push it down.

But......

Yesterday I had a quiet word with myself. I am singing that song from Frozen. I am letting it go. I am going to chill the flip out. I am going to ignore the boundary pushing behaviour. I am going to snuggle up and watch a bit of telly with Pops if we are tired. I shall blithely float past Sam's sharp responses. I am not going to go mad, feeling that I should do this or ought to do that. I have my list, but I'm focusing on relaxation for better hallway vision*

I'm going to try anyway!

Leanne xx

*The Breakfast Club. Remember it?

Godrevy Again

Come on CT, tell me which Blue she is. Silver Studded? Or Common?

If you live here, or if you are visiting anytime soon, I urge you to go to Godrevy. Like a lot of the coastline of West Cornwall, this is an area owned and preserved by the National Trust (I think that the beach and the lighthouse are privately owned). Olly and I walked Honey there yesterday. I thought it would make a change from the dunes. And I had stared at the lighthouse from Sam's window this morning. She looked bright and welcoming in the early morning sun. And she seemed to beckon me over. It's what I told myself as I drove there anyway.

The headland overlooking the lighthouse was swathed in a violet carpet. It shimmered in the morning sunshine and contrasted beautifully with the blue sky above. You know when something is so other worldly that you find yourself catching your breath? When you have to do a double take, just to make sure that what you saw was real? No wonder Granny wanted her ashes to be scattered here. She must have known that she would always be surrounded by great beauty.

Olly bug hunted while I jumped around trying to take photos of the butterflies. I am determined to get better at it, even though I had to concede that maybe jumping was no way to score that money shot. There were hundreds of them flitting to and fro over the coastal heath land. I wondered if there had been a spate of Gatekeepers emerging from their cocoons, there were so many. I watched them chase off bigger butterflies, claiming territories as their own. Olly was fascinated by the orange beetles that were all over the plant life (CT has advised that they are probably soldier beetles. It's what we are calling them now anyway). They were "joined up" he said, as he watched them getting frisky on the flowers.

We watched a young Kestrel for the longest time. She was sat on a rocky outcrop minding her own business and preening her feathers. It was priceless. I thought for a moment that she was a baby, but then she flew up and away. You often see Kestrels here, but the joy never diminishes. There were a great many rabbits too. As I child I remember the delight at seeing the fluffy tail of a rabbit as it bounded away out of sight. I saw the same delight in Olly as he saw not one, but several running into the safety of the gorse bushes. There were Buzzards wheeling overhead and Crows walking shiftily around the top of the headland. We looked for seals, but they must have been out fishing. Olly was convinced that he saw a shark. It was a buoy. At least I hope it was....there are basking sharks spotted from time to time around here.

I was quite reluctant to go to Honey's date with the dog groomer. I could have stayed all day. I think Olly would have been quite happy to as well. I'm thinking that perhaps we will come back this weekend in Betty. The car park doesn't close until ten. We could get up to all sorts. I've always wanted to watch the sun set over Godrevy.

I wish you could join me.

Leanne xx

there are no filters on those photos. It really is that beautiful.

Flight behaviour

I read CJ's post with interest yesterday. She wrote about the come down she was feeling after her holiday. I certainly felt the same this morning, as I came back down to earth with a bump. It was aided and abetted by the daily loggerhead with Alfie. The weekend already seems so far away.

I really didn't want to do the mundane this morning. I knew that I should clean the bathrooms, cut the grass, go to the supermarket and generally get the house into order. But I really couldn't be bothered. So I assigned myself just two jobs; ironing and unblocking the upstairs loo. I figured that I deserved some time out after they were completed, and so I proposed to Olly that we go butterfly spotting. With the dogs. And some chocolate and a juice box. He jumped at the chance. Well wouldn't you?

I have documented the walk we took before, but it's always different. The foxgloves are all but over, the flowers climb further up the stem and are replaced with soft green seed pods. The blackberry bushes are unfurling their pink and white flowers, which are enjoyed by many different pollinators. In fact the sound of buzzing and the amount of flying insects was quite amazing.. The pink campion are still in flower, but their seed pods are mature. We rattled them and Olly enjoyed scattering the seed. Different types of grasses are abundant now, and it enveloped us as we walked down the path towards the cliffs.

There were a great many orange beetles crawling all over the hogweed. At least I think that's what it was. It is similar to cow parsley, although it's chunkier and less wafty. I think there may have been angelica too, but my plant identification is still scant. I did see scabious and kidney vetch growing out of the ancient Cornish hedges that border the fields. Along with thistles and yellow flowers which are all lumped together as dandelions, even though they obviously aren't. I thought afterwards that I should take close ups of all of these, and identify them later. I have a book.

There were butterflies. They were everywhere in fact, and very busy they were too. An abundance of Red Admirals flitting here and there, barely pausing for breath. We spotted Speckled Woods and Gatekeepers, Meadow Browns and what may have been either a painted lady or a larger fritillary. They were too quick for me to photograph, and Olly and the dogs were impatient to keep moving. We also disturbed quite a few day flying moths. White with black speckles. At least I think they may be moths. I need to ask my moth and butterfly guru, CT.

The weather turned as we walked, and spots of rain turned into a rather heavy downpour. Olly insisted that I carry him back to the start of the footpath. He really is too big to carry for any long distance, but I obliged. Time is short with this one. I shall miss our ambling walks together when he starts school in September. Who will I be able to point things out to. Who else will enjoy shaking the campion seed pods or playing the "tree in the summer" game with the grasses? Who will laugh at the daft orange bugs with me, and watch the farmer and his dog herd the cattle from one field into another?

As usual I am writing this post after I have put Pops to bed. It's been mayhem here this afternoon. Lots of teenage hideousness that I won't bore you with. Suffice to say I am frazzled. If it's another fine day tomorrow, I am returning to the hedgerows. I shall record the plants and try capture the butterflies. I think that may help to strengthen my resolve and my nerves for life here.

Leanne xx

Good Enough

Today started with rain. And having to wait in for the man to deposit Sam's computer. I busied myself with the usual - laundry, ironing, getting the toy dinosaurs down from the attic, putting the big Lego back up in the attic, making beds - all the while feeling the urge to get outside and stretch my legs. Olly was tetchy. It's unlike him to be so miserable, but today was definitely an off day for him. The dog was in a mood too. She led on the sofa, with a face like a bag of spanners. Waiting for her walk no doubt. Not understanding that she had to wait in too.

So after a quick trip to the supermarket, we set off. The weather was still looking doubtful, but it had stopped raining. I thought that it might be nice to walk up to the very top of town, and along Towednack Road. We live at the top of The Stennack, the hill that leads up and out of St Ives. Once you get to us, the hill flattens out and the walk is good for little legs that are carrying a miserable child.

We walked along the wall by the wasteland that was once a garage, and found a snail. We thought it would be a good idea to put him on top of a stone pillar and see if he was still there when we walked back (he wasn't. Which confounded Pops). We walked past the Leach Pottery, and it dawned on me that I have never had a poke around there before. I decided that I would visit after half term, but on my own. Pottery and a whirligig four year old are not a good mix. We stopped and had a look at the engines that were being cleaned by the firemen, and posted a birthday card. Both usually enjoyable activities. Not today. We carried on. I suggested that we stop at Consols Pond, and have a drink. We sat on a bench, drank juice and ate pretzels and looked for nature. Pops wanted to see lizards. Of course he did. He was most put out that there weren't any to be seen. Quite vocally in fact.

But we soldiered on. Along Towednack Road. The sun broke free of the clouds, but that just made Pops too hot. We did see an Orange Tip butterfly, which was flitting amongst the gorgeous flowery hedgerows that line the road. But no lizard. And now we were tired and dragging our legs and wanting to go home. Admitting defeat, we turned back. All the while lamenting that our feet were wet from jumping in so many puddles, and that we were too hot to breathe. And that we wanted a wee. Now.

Finally we were home. I sat Pops down and switched on CBeebies. I made myself a cup of tea and plonked the Quaking Grass into an old bit of pottery. Sam was asleep in the conservatory. Clearly his Politics exam had worn him out. After about half an hour of staring at the television, Pops suddenly jumped up out of his seat. He grabbed some crafty bits and made a picture. Then he got out his cars and made an assault course for them. He was all smiles and chatter. I breathed a slow sigh of relief.

.................................

I've been reflecting on today.

Pops just wanted a quiet day at home. Hanging out and flitting from toy to toy. I sometimes lose sight of the fact that just because we haven't done anything, doesn't mean we haven't done anything. I have a need to make sure that Pops has a great childhood, and I forget to consider whether what we are dong is what he wants to do too. We had a really wonderful weekend. But it was busy. It was full of sun and sea and surf. It was later than usual bedtimes and lots of adventures for a little boy. And yesterday he had nursery, which is always full of doing.

So perhaps today was meant to be one of those staying at home days. Those pottering days that restore and recharge us all. I am constantly striving to be the best Mum I can be, when good enough will usually do. I'm not too good at all those clubs and planned activities for children. I was secretly relieved when Sam and Alfie wanted to give up their swimming lessons. I found the implicit competitiveness of other Mums too stressful. And I felt that I wasn't good enough in that kind of arena. So I started to do things my way. But my way can be just as hard sometimes. I'm competing with myself to do the best for them. I feel the need to fill their days with stuff. I'm at home, so I have the time. The old stay at home Mum conundrum rearing it's head from time to time.

So my new mantra: I am good enough. I shall say it to myself daily.

Leanne xx

Hellesveor Cliffs

 

I have to tell you, this morning is a beauty in West Cornwall. The sun is bright in the sky and there is just the gentlest breeze. I don't want to drive and then walk. I just want to walk. I haven't walked out onto the cliffs for so long. The weather has stopped Pops and me from venturing there. Too muddy and a bit tricky for little feet. I had an urge to walk there today. I felt it when I woke up this morning. I'm waking early, and getting the household chores done and dusted before the boys wake up. So that the day can be mine. Call it well planned household management.

It's not far from me, this walk. Just up past the rugby club, along the path that winds through the housing estate, through the horse field and I'm there. Five minutes away from my front door, and I am away. I am transported to a place alive with nature. Those hedgerows are stunning me with their display of bluebells, red campion, cow parsley, hollyhocks, anemones and many others. I take pictures for referencing later. I know quite a lot of the names of wild flowers now, but there are still those that escape me. I look up their name, but it never stays inside my head. Pops and I make up our own names. In rather the same way that they got their names in the first place, I would imagine.

The birds are singing too. I can hear blackbirds, robins and wrens. The occasional 'caaak' of a grouse in the fields. There are skylarks and other songs and sounds that I recognise, but can't give name to. I spot them flitting in and out of the hedgerows, or gathering food along the path. There are buzzards soaring high overhead, catching the thermals as they rise and circle. There are crows in the fields, looking shifty and up to no good.

The pollinators are everywhere. I watch the butterflies waft in front of me, following the path with ease and grace. The speckled woods join together in a tumble. Courting or fighting, I'm not sure which. I know that they are fiercely territorial. I see a Peacock butterfly, but it's too quick for me. It teases me down the path with it's stop start antics. The bumblebees career along too. The seem drunk, as they fly in that hap hazard manner. I am always amazed that they manage to fly at all. They seem to be forever in danger of crashing into things. I spy a tiny butterfly or day flying moth. She is the size of my finger nail. Bright yellow with black spots. I hold my breath and try in vain to take a snap. No good. She's gone. I wait for a while and hope that she will return, like the Brimstone did last year. Honey barks, anxious to get moving again, so I give up and carry on.

And there is the sea. It is gloriously blue this morning. Calm and deep and mesmerising. I find a vantage point and breath lungfuls of sea air. I close my eyes and listen to the sounds the sea makes. I wish that I had brought supplies - a flask of tea would be good right now. There is no-one here. No boats on the water. No walkers passing by. Just me and the Atlantic. I could toboggan down those cliffs and plunge right into the big blue. It is just so inviting. Instead I promise a trip to the beach tomorrow with Pops. To dip a toe or two perhaps.

I walk on. Further than normal. I really don't want to stop. I'd like to keep on walking to Zennor. But I have other things to do today. So reluctantly I turn and head home. I meet a lady running with her IPod. I wonder why? I think she's missing out on all the glorious sounds of nature. I say hello to a couple walking. They are German, I think. I tell them about the yellow butterfly/moth that I saw. I'm a bit like that. Sharing my nature nerdism with others.

..............................

When I get home I look her up. I can't find her. Not on my chart. Not online. I know what I saw. But can't find her anywhere. She's a mystery. If anyone has any idea about what she could be called, I'd love to know.

Here's hoping you all have as lovely a day as I am having.

Leanne xx